Tuesday, June 12, 2007

Today's Question

(Note: it's blogs like this that ensure I'm a'goin' to hell.)

Hallo, friends.

After following a few thoughts down the meandering highway of my mind today (I LOVE not working), I found myself wondering the following:

Why aren't the dead of more use to us?

Seriously. If all the hub-bub is to be believed, once we die we get all sorts of new and magical powers. Omniscience, for example. Superpowers, for another. And I'm just thinkin', if it was me, I'd want to use those little treats of the hereafter to jazz up things on Mother Earth. For example, how great would it be if we could just dial up ol' Uncle Harold and ask him for the winning lottery numbers? I know, I know, it's not practical--after all, if everyone could do it then the lottery winnings would never amount to more than a few pennies, but still. Maybe we could work something out. Or what if Aunt Pearl could zap those people who answer their cell phones in the middle of a movie with a ripping case of hemorrhoids? And it would be lovely if we could be comforted by a quick postcard from Cousin Billy that says all is well, Dad made it after all.

Maybe it's not for me to say--perhaps once we're permanently out of print we aren't interested in exacting revenge for petty annoyances or reassuring the living anymore. But...why not? It ignites the skeptic in me when I don't have firm answers. Personally, I think that God should get on it and become more accessible to his masses. What's wrong with e-mail? Shouldn't the Almighty be able to keep up with technology? After all, if anyone could have seen it coming, it was him. Well, and Sergey Brin and Larry Page, of course. And while he's at it, maybe he could do something about Microsoft, too. The field is wide open for his intervention, my friends, and I'm just sitting here waiting.


5 comments:

A.Fanny said...

This is my spouse's fantasy - we already have a signal to find each other in case we reincarnate together. It would wreck it if I told anyone what it is, but it requires so many assumtions: like, it assumes that we'll be lovers again in the next life and that both of us will have a nose. So just on those two requirements we have innumerable opportunitues to miss each other. I assume that Wicked has not had a sign from anyone from the other side? It's a good topic.

moi said...

I myself regularly receive signs from those on the other side. These signs say: "Hey, there are magazines here! And 1965 Corvettes! And cabana boys with sultry smirks and a perpetual supply of El Patron margaritas!"

It is therefore my belief that perhaps God would like us to fuddgedabout it all and enjoy ourselves at the Great Spa Experience that is the afterlife. And leave the monkey wrenching to Him.

Although, it would be oh so cool to mess with the minds of the living . . .

Orangeblossoms said...

Interesting notion. I think you're right that we won't care when we get there. I hope not, anyway. There is just so much more to learn and live into.... at least I think there is!

My BlueSky said...

Thinkin' outside the box . . . the urn . . . the ________.

They're here.

Anonymous said...

and dinna worry aboot the hell thing; it takes SOOOO MUCH more than this to actually send one to hell. um...as far as i know.